For one reason or another this reminds me of where I work, thanks Jerry! :lol:
An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand and a bucket of buffalo manure in the other. He says to the waiter: "Me want coffee." The waiter says, "Sure chief, coming right up." He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee and the Indian drinks it down in one gulp, picks up the bucket, throws the manure into the air and blasts it with the shotgun, then he walks out.
A few days later the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand and another bucket of manure in the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter: "Me want coffee." The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto, we're still cleaning up from the last time you were in here. What was that all about, anyway?"
The Indian says, "Me in training for job as Engineer; drink coffee, shoot poopie, disappear for a few days." ;)
Patrick,
Here is an oldie, but maybe you havent heard it yet:
There are these 3 engineers sitting arround discussing that if God were an engineer, what type he would be.
The first engineer says that God must have been a Mechanical engineer, because when you you look at all the complex joints pivots in the human body, he must have been a mechanical.
The next engineer disagrees and says that God must have been an Electrical engineer when you laak at all the complex nerve fibers and connections.
The third one says that he disagrees with both of them, and says that God MUST have been a civil engineer. When press by the others to explain, he says "Who else but a civil engineer would site a waste disposal plant right next to a recreational area!"
Three engineers got on a crowded lunchtime bus. They somehow worked their
way to the middle of the bus where they found three girls willing to
exchange their seats for a place on the guys' laps.
After they got settled and had ridden that way for a while, the first girl
suddenly asked the gentleman under her whether he might be an electrical
engineer. Surprised, he replied, "Yes, I am! How did you know?" "Easy," she
said. "I'm getting shocked by your soldering iron."
The second girl asked her guy, "Are you a mechanical engineer?" He said,
"Why, yes, ma'am. How did you know that?" "Simple," she said, "Your piston
is scraping my cylinder."
Shortly thereafter, the third girl turned to her fellow and asked, "Are you
a civil engineer?" "I certainly am," he answered. "How could you have known
that?" "Well," she said, "I figured it out as soon as your dam burst and
flooded my village."
So theese three Engineers and 3 lawyers get on a train, and the Lawyers notice that the Engineers only bought one ticket. When they asked the Engineers why, they were told to just watch and see. As soon as the train got under way, all three of the Engineers crammed into the restroom and when the Conductor came arround, he knocked on the door and said"Ticket Please". An arm extended out the door with the ticket whereupon it was punched. As soon as the Conductor cleared the car, the Engineers came back out and sat down with the Lawyers again. The Lawyers were sutiably impressed with the whole process and they decided that they would try the same thing on the return trip.
On the return trip, the Lawyers purchased one ticket, but noticed that the Engineers purchased none! When they quizzed them on this the Engineers said "Dont worry about it, we got it covered!"
As soon as the train gets under way all three of the Engineers cram in to one restroom and all three of the lawyers cram into the other and wait for the Conductor. After a couple of minutes one of the engineers comes out and walks over to the restroom the Lawyers are in and knocks on the door and says "TICKET PLEASE"............
:seeya
Corvette Store
I thought I'd pass this on....
