Liger

Ok, so I was over at my parents' house with my new Vette (2004 Vert)...

I had it parked at the end of their driveway in their
culdesac.

I was sitting on the couch in my parents living room when
I looked out the front window and saw it:

SPAZ!

...SPAZ is my "pet name" for this little hyper active
kid (real name "Nate") who lives across the circle from
my parents.

Don't get me wrong. SPAZ is a great little kid. But there
are two distinct problems that SPAZ presents to Corvette
owners such as myself.

First off, he's everywhere. SPAZ can cover more ground
in less time than my Vette can.

And second, SPAZ's parents (I learned the hard way)
*obviously* haven't had "the talk" with SPAZ...

You know, the one where they sit SPAZ down and explain
that he can LOOK at other peoples' Corvettes, but NEVER
*touch* them - unless given specific rare (idiotic)
permission by the owner.

Anyway, when I first looked up and saw SPAZ, he was
already IN my parents' driveway, and standing *dangerously*
close to my Vette. To make matters worse, he was carrying
this big obnoxious toy helicopter that he just loves throwing
up in the air at will.

So all of a sudden I'm on the verge of freaking out.

My dad had been out washing his own car, and had just
stepped inside.

So I'm like, "Dad, uh... DAD! SPAZ is out by my car!!
Didn't you see him?! Dad, PLEAZ, go back out and tell
SPAZ to get away from my car!"

You see, I was torn. I didn't want to run out and yell
at SPAZ to get away from my car. I didn't want his
parents (who were across the street in their driveway),
to think I'm some kind of paranoid jerk. So I was urging
my DAD to go out and tell SPAZ to take a hike.

But to my surprise (since I've let him take a number
of drives in my Vette), my dad was like, "Why don't
you go out and tell him?"

And I'm like, "Huh?! Aaaaaaahhh! Bwhaaaat?!" My palms are
getting sweaty. I'm becoming really "anxious". I'm looking
to my left and right - AS IF I'm going to find somebody else
to come to my rescue. I'm still planted on the couch at this
point, but then I take another look out the window and what
do I see??...

SPAZ is *leaning* on my Vette, with his giant obnoxious
toy helicopter in one hand, and the other hand on the
door of my car.

Crap!!!

That was all it took. I got up without saying another
word to my parents, rushed outside, told SPAZ to
step AWAAAAY from the car, started her up, and TOOK OFF.

Actually, just before I stepped into the car SPAZ asked
me, "Is this a CorJette?"

And I'm like, "No SPAZ, errr, Nate, it's called a CorVETTE."

And he's like, "Do the lights pop up?" I told him that indeed they do.

So as I was pulling away from the driveway I popped the
headlights a few times, just to please SPAZ. He got
a big smile on his face as a result. (Clearly, I made
his day.)

...Though as I reflect back on it, entertaining SPAZ by
popping the headlights was probably a BIG mistake.

Now little SPAZ will be even MORE interested in my
"CorJette" the next time I'm over at my parents.
Oh well, live and learn.

If you're ever in the Bloomington, MN area in the
general vicinity of 84th and France (ie, within a 20
mile radius), watch out for SPAZ.

In fact, I'm going to be posting warning signs around
the area for the benefit of all Corvette owners... If you
see a sign with THIS symbol on it:



...you'll know you need to be ON ALERT for SPAZ.

-Bryan

noel48

SPAZ =

madeouttaglass

Good thing you didn't see that scratch he put on the rear end yet.

SmokeyTirez

Hell, I've seen adults with this same need, gravitated towards a Vette to lean on it like they have no control. Sickening.

I'm behind ya man. If the parents aren't gonna sit him down and tell him then you should. I had to do the same when I lived in an apartment and parked my Firebird in covered parking. Kids would come up and ask about it, then immediately go in for the lean or grab on something. I'd have to stop em and give em the "look don't touch" passage.

jrose7004

StuzVette

...so is your name "Mr. Wilson"

tmcclaff

Now thats funny

WellAdjusted

Congrats on showing proper control. I'd be a SPAZ if a helicopter wielding youngster was leaning against my girl.

ExRedRacer

Hey man, you might as well get used to it.

You are lucky that you were in a position to see him. Imagine coming out to your car after he'd scratched it with his little toy and you have no idea how the scratch got there...

I've found that my torch red coupe is like a magnet to little kids. They love to touch things they like.

You have to put it in perspective...there's a reason for insurance and speed shine. Enjoy your ride!

GR8-LIFE

Dude, let me tell what I say to kids when they are messing around with my property and its obvious that their parents dont teach them whats right and whats wrong. I speak to them as they were my own. And trust me, the tone is not very nice. Sure, I've pissed off my neighbor in doing so. But when he told me not to talk to his kids like that, "Well Somebody has to!" And you know, I've discovered that this works!!!'

Autoworker

Several years ago my "Spaz" threw 2 handfulls of gravel on the hood of my freshly painted Firebird Formula. Cost his Mommy and Daddy $450.00 to get the hood repainted.

DAVS Y2K

Definitely one of the most entertaining posts I've read in a long time.
SPAZ

C3 RV

After visiting some of my wife's family last week, I found a number of little scratches in the right rear quarter panel due to some crumb catcher.

Cobra4B

You should have taken SPAZ for a ride in the beast... maybe he'd grow up an American car lover instead of nutting his pants for a hooked up neon.

Liger

Holy smokes, I'd freak out.

-Bryan

blacksedan87

- except that the rational could have been to have a little "heart to heart" with Nate and explain why it's not a good idea to be "disrespecting" other people's property. Take the munchkin out for an ice cream cone - and instead of him leaning against your car because you were mean to him - he might get a valuable life lesson. Sorry - but the SPAZ's in this case are Nate's parents for not teaching him properly.

I try to be cool with the neighbor kids......operative word is TRY!

Torqued84

I've got a half dozen "SPAZs" in my circle. I've seen them lean their bikes up against cars, slides down windsheilds of cars not belonging to their families, and was once told by another adult neighbor a 10 year old was using my Corvette as a target for his mini leather football. I had a calm talk with the kids guardian (for some reason his parents couldn't watch him for a month so my neighbors were watching him) and reminded them how much a new metallic paint job costs. They were really cool and I consider them one of my closest neighbors. I have to constantly remind myself that it is only a car and it is going to get scratched, dinged, etc., but negligent parents make me They need to teach their kids how to be "down with OPP"

georgec114

No harm, no foul...It's better to be a mentor to the kid and make him
a friend. Explain the difference between admiring something and
abusing it. Strees that as he grows up, this car may be the one he
buys. He'll be extra careful.

...George

vetterdstr

Funny how that story brought back a similar experience I had a my friends house... I pulled up to shoot the with a friend of mine and right away all the kids in the neighborhood came over to see my car. Yes a few did touch it and left their finger prints on it but nothing more. The were really excited to see that car in the neighborhood.

Then....... my buddies newlywed friends came over (they were living there while the sale of their new house went through) and the guys wife went crazy!! She liked the car so much, she said after she showered, she was going to come out naked and take pictures on the hood of the car... I said "yeah, we can do that"

Out of respect for her husband... (officer the local police dept) I left before her shower was finished...

Just goes to show you how a Corvette affects people differently...

VR

wpdjoey

So when are your parents moving lol glad he didnt scratch your vette