Sad Day
07-28-2009, 10:33 PM
#44
Instructor
Member Since: Oct 2000
Location: Flemington, nj 08822 usa
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Hang in there. My wife and I are both 5 year survivors. Her with breast, me with Melanoma. For what its worth, we both were decisive and didn't spend a lot of time on "shopping around" for multiple opinions. Get ready for some speed bumps...
Larry
Larry
07-29-2009, 10:05 AM
#47
Melting Slicks
We are so sorry to hear the sad news. Our thoughts and prayers will be definitely with you and your family. This Sunday, I will put in a prayer request for your family at our church. Take care.
07-29-2009, 06:00 PM
#48
Safety Car
Very sorry to hear that news. 
I pray she can recover.
I pray she can recover.
07-29-2009, 09:30 PM
#51
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Location: Cheektowaga NY
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Horrible news,really struck a nerve with me.My most fervent prayers for your wife and you also.If it's of any help,put all of your positive energy toward her and put aside your own feeling of helplessness.Feel free to pm,if you want.Keep faith.
07-30-2009, 03:25 AM
#52
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Prayer sent out here from the deep south. Never underestimate the power of a positive mental attitude(even if it is yours to keep her strong)
Best of luck to the both of you and keep us posted
Frank
Best of luck to the both of you and keep us posted
Frank
07-31-2009, 07:22 AM
#55
Race Director
Member Since: Aug 1999
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St. Jude Donor '03-'04-'05-'06-'07-'08-'09-'10-'11-'12-'13-'14-'15-'16-'17-'18-'19-'20-'21-'22-'23
Oldtimer
I definitely will forward my prays for your wife. At church I'll light a candle for her. I hope everything works out OK.
07-31-2009, 08:10 AM
#56
Former Vendor
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St. Jude Donor '08-'09-'10-'11-'12-'13-'14-'15
I'm sorry to hear this, our prayers go out to you and your wife.
Willcox
Willcox
07-31-2009, 11:05 PM
#58
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That is terrible news. We have been through it several times with my parents, and I wanted to pass on some insights we have learned. I hope they help.
1) Take a breath. You WILL get through this, and the best tool you have is a positive fighting attitude and sometimes a little humor. I have close friend cancer free in year six from a stage four brain tumor. Her daily blog during treatment was one of the funniest things I have ever read. Wish I had saved it.
2) Look carefully at your medical team, and consider seriously going to the big leagues. In our case we have been dealing with Johns Hopkins in Baltimore for years. (rated #1 in the country) It is easy to feel complacent with doctors you know and have a relationship with, but we have found the research, treatment and technology is 3-5 years ahead at JHH, Mayo, Sloan Kettering etc. Your doctors ego will live if you go somewhere else . . .
3) If you have to travel for treatment, the American Cancer Society has a system called Hope Lodge. They are hotel type facilities in eighteen states near hospitals that do major cancer treatment.
(http://www.cancer.org/docroot/subsit...odge/index.asp)
For patients under treatment they are FREE. I think they have a minimum stay of three days, but I do not think they have a max. We used it once for six weeks. Private room with private bathroom (you can stay with her) with community lounges, kitchens, libraries, gardens etc. Shuttle vans to the hospital so you don't have to park. If you want to be alone stay in your room with the TV, but the comaradarie of the others in the same boat can be healing in itself.
4) Ask questions / Take notes. A lot of information is coming at you. Consider taking someone with you to listen and take notes that is not a family member. You and your wife are stressed beyond reason and sometimes details don't sink in.
5) Keep your reciepts, much of the expenses attached to this nightmare are deductible. It helps make up for time taken off etc.
Keep the faith, a lot of people here are praying for you.
1) Take a breath. You WILL get through this, and the best tool you have is a positive fighting attitude and sometimes a little humor. I have close friend cancer free in year six from a stage four brain tumor. Her daily blog during treatment was one of the funniest things I have ever read. Wish I had saved it.
2) Look carefully at your medical team, and consider seriously going to the big leagues. In our case we have been dealing with Johns Hopkins in Baltimore for years. (rated #1 in the country) It is easy to feel complacent with doctors you know and have a relationship with, but we have found the research, treatment and technology is 3-5 years ahead at JHH, Mayo, Sloan Kettering etc. Your doctors ego will live if you go somewhere else . . .
3) If you have to travel for treatment, the American Cancer Society has a system called Hope Lodge. They are hotel type facilities in eighteen states near hospitals that do major cancer treatment.
(http://www.cancer.org/docroot/subsit...odge/index.asp)
For patients under treatment they are FREE. I think they have a minimum stay of three days, but I do not think they have a max. We used it once for six weeks. Private room with private bathroom (you can stay with her) with community lounges, kitchens, libraries, gardens etc. Shuttle vans to the hospital so you don't have to park. If you want to be alone stay in your room with the TV, but the comaradarie of the others in the same boat can be healing in itself.
4) Ask questions / Take notes. A lot of information is coming at you. Consider taking someone with you to listen and take notes that is not a family member. You and your wife are stressed beyond reason and sometimes details don't sink in.
5) Keep your reciepts, much of the expenses attached to this nightmare are deductible. It helps make up for time taken off etc.
Keep the faith, a lot of people here are praying for you.
07-31-2009, 11:24 PM
#59
Melting Slicks
We will pray for your wife's recovery
and your strength, she'll need it now.God bless,
Dean